What went wrong?

Everything, that can go wrong went wrong! During my Board Examinations and just before any exam or an event- I spoiled it. And then I'd here people say "why does it always happen with you?" I'd ask the same to myself but have no conclusive answer. So what can go wrong? And how amiss can it be? I'll tell you.

During boards, my parents seperated (10th) and then divorced (12th) and during my finals at college I had pox from the first exam itself, during Masters - thesis proposal submission day I was down with typhoid and during my Postgraduate final exams- COVID induced Lockdown, what's worse? We were dependent on gadgets during Phase I-lockdown away from home- my laptop stopped working right in the middle of it plus the submission frenzy. Then came Phase II, back in Delhi, wait for it! I got and lost that dream job offer and missing it by a mark after *three rounds* in an International Organisation, again another suitable job offer and couldn't join for I needed to rush back home for an emergency plus the breakup anxiety. It is just then when I had given off everything to fly back, standing at the Airport awaiting my RT-PCR report- it comes positive. I have no fever, no symptoms and yet I cannot fly for 14 days +homeless!!that's ok.  

No wait, before that did I tell you I got through SOAS and Durham along with Kings College London and decided to not accept them, as I din't receive the full scholarship grant just by a mark? Yeah! That happened too...anyway. So, just when I came back to Kolkata within four days of homecoming my beloved grandfather passed away. (I am grateful I could say my last goodbye)

Why am I writing all this? Because with all that went amiss I found my greatest strength, met the best of people, had the best life and achieved things beyond quantifiable in scores, data, money or anything numerical or empirically justifiable. The achievement of writing an exam with broken heart, sore body, with limited gadgets and exhaustion! I scored high grades beyond my GPA. It made me human, all those failures led me to success of attaining a feeling of Equanimity and experiencing greatest love- that is romantic, emotional, intangible and everlasting, bonds of heart. I can only thank lord for being kind to me for all the experiences that make me wealthy, so to whatever goes wrong! Thank God, we get even better. 

All that went wrong, was actually right!

"It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly then to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection."

-Bhagavad Gita

God make me capable enough to serve as a force for the greater good, by all these experiences I live my destiny and gratitude is all I have as your servant.